maddie's funeral

you are probably wondering when i am going to get back to blogging about my own children! i'm sorry if it seems strange that i have written so much about this little girl that i never knew, but as i shared in the last few posts, maddie's family has been on my heart so much lately, and her death has caused me to continually evaluate my daily life with my children. so bear with me as i share this one last post about maddie's funeral. for those of you who have been praying for her family and following her story on this site, i wanted to share this encouraging email from maddie's dad. i am sure we can all learn something from this family's faith, and we can join together in praising God for His presence through all of this.

Tuesday January 22, 2008

When I rose yesterday morning, the first thing I did was pray that the day would pass quickly, convinced that it would be one of the hardest, saddest days for our family. All week I envisioned my legs buckling at the sight of Maddie’s casket. I imagined falling on my face and sobbing at the cemetery. I thought about Anna and Sam and how they would be affected by the overwhelming gloom of the day. But you know, none of those things happened. There were occasional quiet tears and a few runny noses, but somehow peace prevailed. I looked over at Cindy a number of times and asked, “Are you okay?” and she looked back at me with the same curious disbelief and said, “Yeah, I am.” I could not understand why we were not overcome with the grief I was expecting. My suspicion was that all of you ever-faithful prayer warriors were still lifting our family up (a fact that was confirmed by the flood of emails and guestbook entries). I failed to take the advice in Philippians 4 that says, “Do not be anxious about anything . . .” but the next familiar verse that says ‘God will provide a peace that transcends all understanding’ showed up anyway. I’ve said it. I’ve read it. Now we have experienced it. Madeline endured long-suffering and managed to wear a smile through most of it. How could we possibly do less? In the end, the day went by too fast.

Attendance was completely overwhelming, which blessed us tremendously, but also left us wishing we had had more time. I can think of a dozen people right off the top of my head who caught my eye, but were never able to make contact. There were so many familiar faces from our families at Christ Memorial, New Life and Cornerstone Churches. Then there were numerous families we had never met before, who learned of Maddie through friends of friends, and had been praying for her and following her story. Some of them traveled a considerable distance to say hello and goodbye. Finally, there was the hospital staff. We knew Becky and Maree were coming, because they were in the program and we figured that a few others might make it as well, but we had no idea that half the team would show up! Just about every department and discipline was represented, with doctors, nurses, specialists, therapists, etc. It felt like we were on rounds for the last time. You cannot imagine how much it meant to all of us to see you there. (Actually it kind of ticked me off, because I was holding it together until you showed up!) I know there were many more who wanted to come, but couldn’t. You were in our thoughts as well. Maddie loved you all.

We were overrun by people telling us it was the most beautiful and uplifting and hopeful funeral they had ever seen. We agree. We are so grateful to everyone who shared our Madeline and contributed to make it a perfect day. The message was perfect. The music was perfect. The weather was perfect. The walk from the church to the cemetery and up to the hilltop was perfect. The reception was perfect. And the food . . . did I mention the food? No one is going hungry in our house, thanks to the never-ending river of food that is flowing through our front door. If eating is supposed to ease pain and sorrow, then I am the happiest guy on earth! Can we just say thanks to everyone for everything? You are in our hearts and on our minds.

When the curtain came down and the crowd dispersed, Cindy and I had a chance to walk back up the hill and share some quiet time alone and consider the day. The sun was just setting over the Olympic mountains and Liberty bay below was still. It was hard to look at the ground and imagine her buried there, having just had her in our arms last week. We tell the kids that that is just an empty shell, but I still long for it. – just human I guess. I have lump in my throat that I can’t quite clear and my voice cracks if I travel too far down memory lane. She lived with grace, but I never would have thought a three year old could die with grace. Then again, Madeline did a lot of things that surprised us.

We’re not sure what the future of her legacy will be. Some folks have mentioned keeping the web page alive, but Maddie was pretty much the cornerstone of that effort. We believe that God used Maddie for His own glory. He spared her by taking her out of this place, but I cannot believe that the He would have wanted the ministry to cease. It has always been bigger than us and we really want to keep it. However, when Maddie was first diagnosed and we searched the internet for information on her condition, we found no hope in stories that ended in death. For that reason we agreed when we started Madeline’s web site, that we would take it down in the event of the ultimate bad news. We don’t want to sap the hope from another family. We will be praying and listening for direction in the coming weeks and months. Maybe we’ll slap the story in a binder and publish it.

continue to pray for maddie's family! if i receive any more updates, i will do my best to share how they are doing.

getting to know maddie a little...

i just found this video montage that maddie's dad put together back in november....since most of you reading this had (like me) never met maddie, i thought i'd share this video with you. what a cute little girl. go grab your tissue. as you watch it, you will see signs of the incredible love and encouragement that her family received and gave to the hospital staff over the last 6 months. i have no idea who all of the people are in the pictures, but i am confident that maddie's family showed them the love and hope of Christ.



i found this sweet statement in one of maddie's email updates, dated the day after her daddy posted the above video. it was another touch and go time for maddie, and her parents ended the long email with these words...

If God chose to reach down and scoop her up, I could not blame Him, for she is pure joy.

(i told you to grab your tissue!)

just after writing my last post, i jumped in the car to run a quick errand. one of my favorite songs, untitled hymn by chris rice, came on the radio...
whewwww, i bawled through the last verse, thinking of maddie flying to Jesus... and then i arrived at church tonite to sing on the praise team. and you will never guess what song we sang. yup. i can't get the last verse out of my head.

fly to Jesus.
fly to Jesus.
fly to Jesus... and live!
"go maddie go!"

maddie's funeral is tomorrow at 1 PM PST. keep praying for her family.

fearfully and wonderfully made

today is national sanctity of human life day, begun by president reagan to coincide with the anniversary of the horrific court decision of roe vs. wade to legalize abortion. during our church's worship service this morning, we read psalm 139 responsively, and i couldn't help but think of maddie. usually when i read this chapter, my own children come to mind... but today, as i could hardly speak the words "i praise You because i am fearfully and wonderfully made", i thought of maddie. as the congregation proclaimed, "all the days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be", my eyes welled up with tears considering God's sovereignty in maddie's little life. and then the kicker was singing "He knows my name"...

I have a Maker
He formed my heart
Before even time began
My life was in his hands

this song really touched my heart today in a different way than before. i remember singing it when i was pregnant with caroline, before i knew if she was a girl or a boy. i could hardly sing the words "He knows my name" without crying... considering the mystery of the life inside me and believing that God already knew so much about this baby that i had not yet met. but today during worship, while most people's thoughts were on the beginning of life in a mother's womb, maddie was really on my heart. though her earthly body has died, she has begun a new life... life that is such a reality but that is still such a mystery to us-- the life that we will live for eternity in Heaven with Jesus. i was thinking about how, to most of the medical community, maddie's heart was bad. it was dysfunctional and in need of repair. but God chose to form maddie's heart in such a way to bring glory to Him. her life and her family's faith were (and are) no doubt a testimony to so many people. God did not make a mistake when he formed maddie in her mother's womb. she was fearfully and wonderfully made. and praise the Lord, she is truly in the hands of her Maker now.

as i sat down to share those thoughts, i received an email update from maddie's family. i should fill you in by saying that their church was already planning to host a blood drive in maddie's honor yesterday, so they decided to combine the blood drive with a memorial service for maddie. here's the update...

Sunday January 20, 2008

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens;
a time to be born and a time to die...
a time to weep and a time to laugh...
a time to mourn and a time to dance...
a time to be silent and a time to speak..." Ecc. 3:1-8

Cindy writes:

How interesting this verse. All of the things in it that Dave and I and our family are doing right now are just the opposite of what Madeline is doing. We are crying, weeping, mourning, but she has been born anew and is now finally dancing, laughing and speaking her little heart out! (Oh how that child could speak!!- shhhh! Was not a concept she understood). It is true though, our hearts have quite the Maddie shaped hole carved out of them right now and it hurts. It is just too painful. However, it does not diminish our hope and we praise God that this all is not truly over, it is merely a time out. It is something like this that helps to keep us from clinging to this old world too much. It is something like this that helps us to long for heaven, and that is good. I do believe that's how it's supposed to be.

The visitation went very well and I am delighted to say that there were over 72 pints of blood donated yesterday (probably just a drop in the bucket to all that Mad's had consumed in the last 6 months, but it's a start). You can still donate in her name and honor at any blood bank - we think it is such a wonderful act of love. I can't tell you how it blessed us to see so many people come out to give of their selves that way. It probably would have been much much higher but they just ran out of beds, time and volunteers. Wow. I couldn't imagine doing a "visitation" any other way. Maddie was not your average kid, and therefore no average service will do.

There were a whole lot of people that came out. It was mind blowing the love and support that was poured out upon us. We had people come from Spokane and Puyallup, (not to mention our families from Kentucky and Tennessee), the chaplain from Children's came, as did some of our nurses and our favorite Children's family and even one of Maddie's doctors appeared (a little bit late, so we took him home for dinner)! It was amazing. And most of all, we made it through. I'm finding the verse, "as your days are, so shall your strength be.", to be true to word. These are the hardest, saddest days of our lives. My heart is groaning within me, and yet, the sun came up again today. Glory be to God. Dave and I will both be writing some thoughts later in the week about all of this. But until then, please just know how much we've appreciated all of your words, all of your prayers and all of your love. You have cocooned us with it, and we can tell.

keep praying for maddie's family.

crying for a family i've never met....

tonight, sweet maddie is dancing. she is smiling and laughing and talking. she is skipping and running... straight into the arms of Jesus. maddie died this morning. the last 6 months have been such a time of ups and downs for little maddie's health. as i have written before, i cannot even imagine what all of this has been like for her family. that is a really cheesy understatement. i am sitting on my couch, unable to stop crying for this family that i have never met... a total stranger to them, i am struggling to wrap my heart and my mind around the truth that their little girl is with Jesus. i want to rejoice for maddie. i want to praise the Lord that she is no longer bloated with 6.5 liters of extra fluid in her poor, worn out body. but my "mommy's heart" weeps as i look back at pictures on maddie's website... pictures of her being silly with her brother & sister, pictures of her 2nd birthday. i can only imagine how many pictures her mommy is replaying in her mind tonight.

here is the email that we received today (emphasis mine)...

We are crushed today. Last night Madeline's pupils failed to react to light, so an emergency CT scan was ordered. The image revealed that Maddie's precious little brain had hemorrhaged and was severely swollen. We were hoping and praying for good news, but the opposite came. Maddie was pronounced brain dead last night just past midnight. We said goodbye and took her off of all life support and she died peacefully in our arms at 10:15 this morning. We are stunned and speechless. Our hearts are broken, and we are so very sorry to have to announce this news to all of you faithful and beautiful people. Today the King of Kings welcomed our princess home. The worst day of our lives was the best day of hers.

We are on the way home right now to let Anna & Sam down. They love their baby sister more than words can express, so this will be a hard one. Please pray for peace for our family in the weeks ahead. Leaving the hospital today was like leaving our best friends. Every day for six months, the staff was our family, and then in one day it was all gone. There is joy somewhere in all of this, but I cannot see it yet. I am praying for that clarity.

i realize that this is not about me. it's not really even about maddie & her family. it's about giving God the glory at all times, even when we do not fully understand. but every update from maddie's family has caused me to realize how silly my worries are and how weak my faith can be. as this little girl has been fighting for her life, i have been concerned that caroline doesn't have shoes to match a certain outfit. as maddie's parents packed up all her stuffed animals today, i complained that i didn't have enough time to get any laundry done. as maddie's parents drove home today to tell their other two children that their sister was now in Heaven, i got aggravated with my children as i tried to carry on a phone conversation. wow. Lord, forgive me. i do not thank God enough for the precious gifts of ethan and caroline. i take their health and their thus far uneventful lives for granted. i see now that i take a lot for granted. we don't want to think about things like this, but either of them could die as easily as maddie died this morning. we do not know God's plan for their lives. they are truly not OURS, but a precious gift from the Lord. i must remember that. maddie's mom and dad are living that now.

i urge you to pray for maddie's family. their hope is in the Lord, praise God for such hope. they have asked for prayers for peace and clarity, so please join me in prayers to that end for them. i will do my best to share further updates that i receive from their family.

go hug your children, praise God for each one of them, and remember to pray for maddie's family.

little maddie needs prayers again

remember sweet maddie that we prayed for a couple of months ago? boy has the last month been full of recovery for her! her family was readying themselves for her to be discharged from the hospital last week, and she suddenly became very critical again. she is back on machines for breathing that she was finally weaned from, and it looks like a heart transplant is now necessary for this 3 year old little girl. her parents ask for prayers that her lungs would heal so that the process for a heart transplant can begin. here is the email from her dad that i received this morning...

Monday November 26, 2007

11:00 AM
The ENT team is about to start a rigid bronchoscope to try and remove the casts in Maddie’s lungs by suction. The eminent risk for any procedure while on ECMO is bleeding. If the bronchoscope nicks her trachea, she could bleed and possibly be unable to stop. The hope is that they will encounter only a few casts and once removed, her lungs would inflate. The other possibility is that they would encounter massive amounts of casts to the depths of her bronchial tree. They would still attempt to remove these, but at a greater risk of bleeding.

12:10 PM
The bronchoscope was very productive. Unfortunately they found lots of casts. Fortunately they were able to get everything they saw without any significant bleeding. In a couple of days the doctor will come back and take another look to see if the casts have returned. In the meantime the RT will attempt to puff a little air into her lungs and see what happens.

There is a two part problem that needs a two part solution. Part one is to clean up her lungs presently to get her off of ECMO. Part two is to treat the underlying cause of the plastic bronchitis. If the underlying cause is her Fontan circuit, she may be looking at a heart transplant. I hope that is not the case.

10:45 PM
Since the day Madeline was diagnoses with HLHS we pretty much knew what her course would be. She has been a difficult case in every stage, but at least we had the hope of being "Done" for a while. We have always said, "Norwood, Glenn, Fontan, and then maybe a heart transplant in her early teens to late twenties." What a great feeling it was last week to be at the end of her Fontan. - ready to go home and enjoy normal life for a couple of decades. Sadly, that will not be the case for our beautiful daughter. The topic of heart transplant as one of many alternatives has become the only alternative. No one can say what the precise cause of the casts that have spontaneously formed in Maddie's lungs is, but it is clear that they are a product of her Fontan circuit. When she comes off of ECMO there is every reason to believe that the casts will return.

Today has been perhaps the hardest for me to swallow, because I always knew the plan, and now that plan is gone. Today we closed the book on the three-stage procedure we started three and a half years ago. Tomorrow begins a new chapter of the story of Maddie's heart transplant. There are still many obstacles to overcome before she is even eligible for a heart, so tomorrow we will focus on her lungs. She must come off ECMO to move forward and she must use her lungs to come off ECMO. She has two lungs, so take your pick for prayer.

please join me in praising God for carrying this family so far, and pray not only for healing that would bring glory to God but peace for her parents while they are in this valley.

one happy mama & one happy maddie!

i am so thankful to give this praise report about sweet maddie!!! for the last week, she has been doing so well! praise the Lord!!! thank you for your prayers... last thursday, maddie was extubated, which means she was taken off the ventilator and got back to breathing on her own. this is HUGE! from there, it just got better. she is now going on wagon rides around the hospital grounds and is back to more of her normal self. i'd say that's quite a difference from being hooked up to so many machines! i know her parents are enjoying every minute of this week! if you go to her website, the updates for her huge improvement begin on oct 11. (click the left arrow, & scroll down) her parents are such a humble witness for the glory of God. i do hope you'll read her updates soon. praise God for His healing, and i urge you to pray for continued healing for little maddie.

yes, i will talk about my own kids soon!

a prayer for healing

i ask all of the believers who read my little blog to stop what you are doing, get down on your knees, and pray for this precious little girl. maddie is the 3 year old daughter of a friend of my friend, wendy. she has been through more in her short little life than most of us can ever imagine. she and wendy's two babies were born with HLHS, which is a serious congenital heart defect. she has had a very rough week to say the least. here is the email wendy sent to me sunday morning:

I only have a few minutes, but I wanted to ask for prayers for a dear friend's little girl. I met this family while Colin was in the hospital, and we've been close friends ever since. Maddie, age 3, had a Fontan (the last in the 3 part series for HLHS) on Jul 24. She's been in the hospital ever since and has recently taken a turn for the worst. She is in ICU on full life support, including a ventilator and heart/lung bypass machine (called ECMO). The usual survival rates on ECMO are about 10 days, though some have survived a month or more. She's been on about 6 days now, and so far the doctors are stumped as to how to get her off. They have attempted a couple procedures to improve her lung function, and they almost lost her yesterday after she began bleeding. They had to replace about 2 to 3 times her blood volume.

I felt it upon my heart to get here as fast as I could. I got back from Vegas on Tues and flew out here on Thurs. I left Clayton with Ryan. He leaves for survival school tomorrow, and my mom and sister came down to keep him until I get back on Tues. You know God must have really laid it upon my heart for me to leave Clayton. As I was getting on the plane I couldn't help but wonder what was I thinking. I've been so very glad I came though. I feel like Cindy, Maddie's mom, really needs a friend right now.

We are all very exhausted here and are praying continuously. Please help us, and please pass on the message to your most faithful of friends.

ok, folks, if that email didn't bring tears to your eyes, read the testimony of maddie's parents at the bottom of their website... here's an excerpt.

Most of you already know this, but just in case there is any doubt, the foundation of our strength is not technology or medical wonders or positive energy or karma or the way the stars are aligned. Our strength comes from the hope we have in eternal life through Christ Jesus. You may be thinking just now, "Is David really going to exploit Madeline by an attempt at evangelism?" You bet I am. What is your source of hope if not in the creator of all things? No, we are not strong at all. We do not rely on God to give us strength, but rather to be our strength for us.

what an example of faith. as i look at the pictures of her little body hooked up to so many machines in a cold hospital room compared with the pictures below of ethan happily chasing bubbles, i am speechless. i am full of contrasting emotions thinking about this family and my own. i am humbled, i am sad, i am thankful, i am most definitely unworthy. despite my dueling feelings, i am confident that God is sovereign over maddie's life just as He is over ethan's. i am sure of it. i could go on and on, but we all need to be praying. so i urge you to lift up this family in prayer.

may God have all the glory.

time flies when you're getting fatter...

has it really been almost 2 weeks since i posted anything? gosh, i didn't think my days were THAT busy, but i guess they are. last week, brian was in st. louis for work, so i was kinda in a funk all week anyway. i don't do well when he's gone. i don't sleep well (pregnant or not), and my mom comes over to stay every night after work to help out with ethan. he really is ready for new entertainment by 5pm! :) (thank you mom!!) we are so blessed to have so much family here to help out with ethan. i am sure God would get me through it if we lived away from family, but i appreciate His grace in planting us close to home.

i have a lot of pictures to post, but i don't know how much i'll get done tonite. it's been a busy weekend for our family. we all went to see brian's grandparents and aunts & uncle yesterday... jeff & kristie introduced karina to the crazy family, and ethan got to show off his walking. :) i will hopefully post those soon.

my dr's appt this past week went well... i'm measuring just as i should be, though i expect to get the "you're measuring big" comments beginning next month. :) caroline is definitely growing... i am still feeling good, but sleeping and bending down are getting harder to accomplish. i'm including my latest pregnancy picture--28 weeks--though it's not too great. the reason i don't like it is because i look bigger than i did in my last one (DUH!!)... i said that to brian, and he just looked at me with that "whatever i say is going to get me into trouble, so i'm not going to say anything" look.... all of that to say, i'm growing, caroline's growing, all is well. just counting down till november 14th. i can't believe that's only about 11 weeks away!

as most of you know, i had a c-section with ethan due to the fact that he did not drop and my labor was not progressing after 33 hours of natural labor.... well, my doctor has been very encouraging (since my 2-week post-delivery appointment) about the possibility of being able to deliver my future babies by vbac (vaginal birth after caesarean). i didn't know that would even be an option, but the more i read about it, the more i see that the success rate is rather high for it. there are "risks", and some have the opinion that it is more dangerous to attempt a vbac than to have a repeat c-section... i don't really agree with that, but that's another post for another time. i am hopeful that caroline's birth will be less eventful than ethan's. this has been a very different feeling pregnancy to me (she's sitting so much lower, kicking so much more....) that i'm hoping it will be a very different labor. i'm just mentioning this because i would appreciate your prayers in several ways:

1. prayer for peace over the next 11 weeks- i can analyze and research this to death, but it doesn't make the possibility of a successful vbac for ME any higher. this is yet another way that God is reminding me that HE is in control and that HE will ordain how caroline will come into this world. i seem to always need a lesson in the whole control thing...

2. prayer that i will look to His Word for guidance in this issue-instead of googling "vbac" at night, i need to be searching Scripture for verses to remind me of God's faithfulness and His sovereignty in my life.

3. prayer for discernment and wisdom if/when we need to "decide" c-section vs. vbac- my dr. has said that we'll "play things by ear" and see how things look as we get closer to my due date.

4. prayer for a safe delivery-when the day comes for caroline to enter this world, of course we will just want her healthy- no matter how she gets here.

thanks for your prayers about our baby girl! we can't wait to share her with all of you.

quick update on lorelei

i've been meaning to post this update on lorelei... she is home from the hospital but is continuing to vomit and lose weight. as of last week, she was being given continual feeds through a feeding tube. hopefully, this will help alleviate the vomiting. her neurologist said that her shunt looks good, so this feeding issue is a separate problem. kim & josh are taking her to a GI specialist to try to figure out what is going on. the many tests thus far have not given any indication to what could be causing this. please continue to pray for lorelei and for the medical professionals that see her... kim & josh are worn out and so badly want to know what is wrong with their little girl. one praise is that the neurological issues seem to have been resolved for now. thank you for praying...

prayers for my family & for lorelei

today's been a day of not so good news.

this morning, my mom received a call from my uncle saying that my granddaddy was not doing so well. he is well into his 80's, and his body has just seen better days. my grandparents realized last year that they couldn't keep up their precious house anymore, so they sold their house last winter and moved into an assisted living home. since then, granddaddy's health has really been declining. he has been in and out of a couple of rehab/nursing home type places after falling, and he has been in a similar facility since our last visit in march. this morning, my uncle couldn't wake him, and he had a high fever. my mom packed in a hurry and headed up to nashville this afternoon, though we weren't able to go with her. i just talked to her a few minutes ago, and she said that granddaddy is very emaciated. his eyes were open, but he was staring off into space. he didn't seem to be aware that anybody was with him. i also was able to talk to my grandmother, who seemed to be at peace with how everything was going. watching him slowly go downhill has been exhausting for her, and i know she is ready for him to be with the Lord. what a blessing we have to hope in the Lord. earlier today, i was rereading the post i'd written after grandmother and granddaddy sold their house... how these words ring ever true tonite. thank you, God, for Your Eternal Glory:

though these gloomy emotions came over me, i found peace in the fact that this house is just a house. all this stuff that i've grown up loving and visiting is just....stuff (and a whole lot of junk!). one day, this house will be destroyed. everything will be destroyed, but my grandparents will have another home, a permanent dwelling not made with hands. one day they will live for eternity in a mansion in Heaven, and there won't be junk and there won't be dust. Matthew 6:19-21 says,

Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

i am thankful that i have Hope in more than a sweet little house surrounded by beautiful trees. i am thankful that i have Hope in my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. He causes my heart to be filled with joy instead of sadness, and He has given me a treasure greater than i could find in the endless storage at my grandparents' house. praise God for His gift of grace and mercy that allows me to look past the momentary trials of this life to the glory of our eternal God.

2 Corinthians 4:16-18
Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

as my granddaddy is literally wasting away outwardly, he is about to achieve that eternal glory. WOW. may i remember to fix my eyes on what is unseen, for that's what really matters.


sweet little lorelei is back in the hospital as of monday. the only information i have is that she is not gaining weight and that the doctors are worried that she is starving. please pray for this precious baby who has been through so much in her short little 6 weeks of life.

i'll try to keep this updated with news from my family and from lorelei's situation. thanks for all the prayers.

welcome home, lorelei!

sweet baby lorelei is finally home from the hospital! praise God!

she is continuing to keep fluids down and is making progress. that is such good news to share... thank you for your prayers. i'll keep you updated as i hear how she's doing.

philippians 4:19-20... and my God will meet all your needs according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus. to our God and Father be glory for ever and ever. amen.

a good day for lorelei

great news on baby lorelei... i don't know details about her surgery, but apparently it was successful. she was able to take in 3-4 oz. of a bottle without throwing it up, which really is excellent progress. she has had a great day yesterday and last night. please pray that this recovery continues. the word is that she needs 3 days in a row like this to be out of the woods.

today is her one month birthday. happy birthday, baby girl!

thank you for your prayers.

another surgery for lorelei

it's been awhile since i'd heard any updates on lorelei... i got word today that she is in surgery this afternoon to place a shunt in her brain. apparently, she'd been showing some improvements since the last surgery, but pressure built up on the brain again. this little girl's body has gone through so much in her short little life... she will be one month old on may 22. please continue to pray for lorelei, as well as for her parents, josh & kim.

thanks for your prayers. God is faithful.

talked to kim today...

i was able to talk to kim, lorelei's mom, for about 30 minutes today. she stayed at the hospital last night by herself so her husband josh could go home and get some rest (he hadn't been home since sunday), and she was pretty tired. you don't get much sleep with nurses coming in and monitors beeping... she said lorelei seemed more agitated and in pain today (probably from the surgery and the tube in her head to drain the fluid). it sounds like it will take a few days after the surgery to see some improvements, but the doctor is really positive about everything. they are planning on doing more surgery next week sometime to put the shunt in her brain. that will be permanent, and it will allow fluid to drain to her stomach. (sorry if that's too much info!!)

it was really good to talk to her and to hear that though they're extremely tired and emotionally worn out, they feel like lorelei is going to be ok. they are just doing a lot of waiting these days, which makes the days feel even longer. this weekend will be 2 weeks in the hospital, and kim said after they leave the pediatric ICU, they'll still have to step down to a regular room in the hospital before going home. lorelei's neurologist is very good and reassuring... they feel like they can really trust his decisions and recommendations, and as i said earlier, he is very positive about lorelei's prognosis. so that's a blessing.

toward the end of our conversation, kim said that she knows God will use this for His glory somehow...and she is thankful that there's so many people praying for them... she asked that we just keep praying.

here are some specific ways you can pray:
- for lorelei's continued healing and recovery
- that josh and kim will be able to get some rest
- for their almost 2 yr old son, paxton, who is wondering where his routine has gone!

matthew 21:22-"and whatever you ask in prayer, you will receive, if you have faith."

thanks for your prayers!!!

successful surgery!!!!!!!!

i just got word that lorelei's surgery went really well and that her color looks good. praise God for this great report!! thanks to all of you who got down on your knees on behalf of sweet baby lorelei. please don't stop praying for this family, though. pray for continued recovery for lorelei, as well as rest for her parents, josh & kim. it's quite an understatement to say that this has been a tough week for them.


1 peter 1:3-9
praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! in His great mercy He has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade—kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God's power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time. in this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. these have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. though you have not seen Him, you love Him; and even though you do not see Him now, you believe in Him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls.

keep praying... surgery this morning

due to another patient being more critical, lorelei's surgery was moved to this morning. i have not heard anything more than that at this point. thank you for your prayers. keep praying.

lorelei's surgery

please, please, please continue to pray for baby lorelei. her condition has not improved in the past week. she is now in the ICU at the scottish rite children's hospital in atlanta. they have been hoping that surgery would not be necessary, but this week has not been a good one for her. they are planning brain surgery today-- not just a shunt, but actually going into the brain. she is in very critical condition. kim & josh have not given up hope, for they know that God is in control of their newborn daughter's life. they appreciate your prayers. i'll keep you posted.

2 cor. 1:3-5, 10-11
praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. for just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows...on Him we have set our hope that He will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers. then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many.

please pray for lorelei

one of my college roommates and dear friends just gave birth to a beautiful, healthy little girl on saturday, april 22. all was well with lorelei and family until she began bleeding in her brain this past weekend. i don't know very many details, but i know that she is still in the hospital at this point. she had a good day yesterday, and they were hoping to bring her back home today, but she began vomiting last night. this could be a sign that there is compression on the brain. i ask for your fervent, fervent prayers for my friends kim and josh and their precious baby girl. they have faith in our mighty God Who has the power to heal this sweet child... i pray that God will grant them peace as they watch and wait with so many questions and that He will be glorified through the events of this week and beyond. i know they appreciate your prayers.

eph. 3:20- now to Him who is able to do immeasureably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us. to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations forever. amen.

prayers for a friend

keep my dear friends, eric and kristi, in your prayers. their family has had an amazingly hard week. kristi tells it better than i could. i'm not surprised that, through all of the heartache and pain, they continue to give glory to God. they can see the bigger picture, the kingdom of God, the hope of heaven... praise God for His peace that surpasses all understanding.